


Muggle Contraptions

by justanexercise



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: F/F
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-02-20
Updated: 2014-02-20
Packaged: 2018-01-13 05:03:27
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 704
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1213732
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/justanexercise/pseuds/justanexercise
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Fleur learns about the many uses of Muggle things from Hermione. (Non-connecting one shots).</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Television

When Hermione first bought their television set, she could not have foreseen this. She had just wanted to watch some documentary series and some movies, but now the television was used for far more nefarious purposes. At least according to Hermione they were nefarious.

 

“Yes! I knew it!” Fleur pointed at the telly.

 

Hermione shook her head, trying to concentrate on reading the book across her lap, but was having trouble due her very energetic girlfriend bouncing on the couch.

 

“Honestly Fleur, how can you watch this?” said Hermione.

 

“I am watching men get their comeuppance!”

 

“Oh for goodness sake.” Hermione shut off the television and sat on the remote. Peace and quiet at last.

 

“Turn it back on,” Fleur reached under Hermione in search of the remote. “Give it here!”

 

“No, I will not be subjected to inane shows.” Hermione slapped Fleur’s hands away.

 

“I need to know if he is the father of the child Hermione.”

 

“They’re always the father Fleur.”

 

“Not always,” she protested with a pout.

 

Hermione took a deep breath. “Oh fine, stop giving me that pout.” She turned the television back on.

 

Slapping her hands in glee, Fleur kissed Hermione as thanks.

 

Fleur Delacour, the most prim and proper – dare she say snobbish – woman was watching mind melting tabloid talk shows. Hermione shut her book and turned towards Fleur, might as well enjoy the view.


	2. Texting

Hoot hoot.

 

Hermione ignored the sound of her mobile, focusing on the book Ron needed for the latest case he needed help on. Apparently even after two years of being in Magical Law Enforcement, the man-boy still couldn’t do proper research on his own.

 

Hoot hoot.

 

Her mobile buzzed on the table.

 

“Aren’t you going to check that?” Ron pointed towards the glowing screen.

 

Tracing the sentence with her finger, Hermione answered, “In a moment, it’s probably Fleur.”

 

Hoot hoot.

 

“Oh for Merlin’s sake,” Hermione huffed. “Can you tell me what’s so urgent?”

 

“S-sure.” Ron gingerly grasped the mobile, still unused to muggle technology. He took one glance at the screen and felt his heart stop.

 

Ron whimpered and Hermione looked up to see him turning purple, she hadn’t seen him turn that particular shade since he had nearly died after choking on a chicken wing.

 

“Ron? Are you alright?” Hermione edged towards him.

 

“Fine!” he shouted and dropped the fragile mobile on her table. “I-I have to go.”

 

“What? But-“

 

Ron snatched the book from Hermione’s hand, quickly covering his lower body with the thankfully enormous tome.

 

Her eyes drifted to her mobile. Hermione saw just what was wrong. Turning towards Ron, her face burning with embarrassment she tried to explain. “Wait, Ron it’s not what you think!”

 

“I-I…” he stuttered.   
  
“She was talking about my pie,” Hermione said. Then she realized how that could be taken. “I didn’t mean-“

 

At that attempt, the tips of Ron’s ears matched the shade of his face. The poor boy leapt across the room and smacked his head on the door when he tried to open it and run out at the same time. Luckily he still managed to slip through the crack.

 

Hermione ran her hand through her tangled hair. Great. Ron probably wouldn’t be able to stay in the same room as her and Fleur for another week. Spotting some droplets of blood on the floor, she performed a quick _Scourgify_ , though Hermione wasn’t sure if that blood was from hitting his head on the door or the massive nose bleed he assuredly had gotten. Turning her attention back towards the cause of all this ruckus, Hermione picked up her scratched mobile and scowled at the preview text on her screen.  


_I can’t wait to taste your peach_

 

Of course the entire message surely was not as naughty as Ron had envisioned. She read the entirety of the texts Fleur had sent and felt the blood from her cheeks drain down to her nether regions. Well, luckily Ron only saw the last part of the chain of texts. Leave it to Fleur to change her decidedly innocent comment about making a peach pie for dinner into something more. Hermione scowled, she never should have taught Fleur how to text, or better yet, sext.


End file.
